Tuesday, September 17, 2024
My Spiritual Transformation Through the 12 Days of Christmas
As an American mom in the late '90s, I found myself swept up in the quest for a perfect Christmas. I envisioned everything: perfect children, perfect Christmas cards, a perfect meal, a perfect tree, perfect decorations, and perfect gifts for everyone—all packed into one day. I believed that perfection equaled love.
What was I thinking?
By the end of Christmas Day, I was always exhausted, overspent, and disappointed. I worried I hadn’t truly taught my children about the birth of our Savior, the King of Kings, the Prince of Peace. I certainly hadn’t modeled the peace that surpasses all understanding in the chaos of the season.
It’s easy to say, “Keep Christ in Christmas.” But how?
Christmas, our most sacred celebration, has been thoroughly secularized. Today, I offer a remedy for keeping Christ at the center of the holiday.
Growing up in a Jesuit parish and raising three children with my husband, I wanted to know how to step off the chaotic Christmas merry-go-round. I wanted to experience God more deeply in our family life. So, I began researching.
In 1999, we received a letter from our parish priest, Father Russ S.J. (may he rest in peace). He shared that “The 12 Days of Christmas” might be a secret code written by a “wily Jesuit” from Ireland in the late 1600s. Intrigued, I dove deeper into this theory.
The only resource I could find was a $19.99 digital download created by two lovely Protestant women. They referred to the tragic Penal Years in Ireland—when the song was likely written—as a time of “Holy wars.” But there was nothing holy about the persecution Catholics endured, as the lives of the Irish Martyrs testify. Persecution is not a war, and it certainly isn’t holy.
Reluctantly, I bought the packet. It was filled with crafts and prayers for every day of Christmas—a true labor of love. But it also felt like a lot of steps toward yet another “perfect” Christmas. This made me reflect on how my family was celebrating the holiday. How could we shift our focus to the gifts of God and celebrate more fully?
That’s when it hit me: start with the song. So, with my family's help, I wrote "Our Father Gave to Us the 12 Days of Christmas."
Then came the real challenge—living it out.
Despite all my planning and preparation, I often fell short. I was exhausted, disappointed by unmet expectations, and, of course, over budget. Creating Christmas for my family felt like a full-time job, especially when you're as easily distracted as I am.
But this is where true transformation entered our lives.
If Christmas begins on Jesus's birthday, after observing and preparing during Advent, then the celebration should extend beyond just one day of frenzied merrymaking. By embracing all 12 days of Christmas, I received a gift: for the first time as a mother, I was able to immerse myself in the spiritual reality of celebrating the birth of the Prince of Peace. By focusing on God's gifts of faith, our family shifted its focus from materialism to the true meaning of the season.
Stepping off the Madison Avenue-inspired merry-go-round was a relief.
More on the Research Process…
When I first started researching the “12 Days” code theory, I encountered controversy. The New York Times doubted it, dismissing Father Stockert, the priest who discovered 17th-century letters in the Georgetown library while researching his doctoral thesis in the early 1960s. Snopes rejected the theory too, claiming that Protestants and Catholics believe the same things—a gross oversimplification of history.
I believe Father Stockert’s testimony, and when I sent Snopes the interview where he explained his findings, they essentially called him a liar. I didn’t know Father Stockert well, but I quickly learned he was an honorable man dedicated to living the Gospel. May he pray for us.
The debate over the authenticity of “The 12 Days of Christmas” as a secret Catholic code remains unresolved. The letters Father Stockert found in the 1960s have yet to resurface. But in the meantime, I’ve written a song inspired by this probable code. More importantly, our family’s Christmas has been transformed for generations to come.
I hope it blesses your family too.
Pax Y Bien!
Rebecca Even
CEO Of A.M.D.G. Productions LLC
Catholic author, Speaker, Songwriter but not a singer, Rebecca Even is a wife and mother with a passion for working with women especially mothers of all ages.
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